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This is Who I Am

“This is who I am”

I hear this all the time. Often times it is an excuse for poor behavior.

“I can’t help it, this is just who I am …”

We are all stuck with “who we are.” And we have varied ways of dealing with this problem. Some of us deal with it in “healthy” ways. We have learned to cope, adjust, focus on our strengths and compensate for our weaknesses. We have followed the rules, applied ourselves, become moderately or adequately successful.

Others of us have dealt with it in unhealthy ways. We have anesthetized who we are with a distraction, – any entertainment that provokes pleased interest and distracts you from worries and vexations, in other words losing ourselves in the oblivion of a bottle or drug, entertainment, sex. We have found diversions that distract us from our ego.

Our culture has addressed this issue by classifying and categorizing. So, we either have a healthy self-esteem or we are lacking in self-esteem. We are either functional or dysfunctional.

The Bible addresses these issues with the gospel.

You are stuck with who you are.
You are stuck with your heritage and upbringing – your history.
You are limited in your capacity to change.
Your “health” is not good enough.

The Bible addresses both groups.

There are a myriad of stories of people who don’t do well – who stumble and fall – most recently politician Mark Foley and pastor Ted Haggard. The two extremes (healthy and unhealthy, functional and dysfunctional) have a certain kind of rejoicing over this public display of sin.

The dysfunctional breath a sigh of relief and say -“ there are people worse than me. At least I didn’t’t get up and pretend to be good. And off they continue in their life of futility saying, “this is who I am, I can’t do anything different, so I might as well enjoy my misery…”

The functional worry about the right response, the balance of strong moralizing coupled with appropriate finger wagging. All the while rejoicing that we have been successful at maintaining our own helpless facade, knowing that we are no better, but feeling that we have made an appropriate effort to “be good” ultimately leading to the judgmentalism we bristled at in the first place with regards to politicians and pastors.

The gospel addresses both groups.

You are not good, you never will be apart from God.
The depth of your disease is not beyond the scope and power of the cross.
The height of your health is not accomplished enough to match the cross, but that is OK, grace is given, not earned.

Some of us are hiding in our sin.
Some of us are hiding our sin.

We are both needy.

When you get this…Ted Haggard, Mark Foley, Jimmy Swaggart, Jim Bakker, Bill Clinton, OJ Simpson, Steve Bagdanov…none of their short-comings surprises you, nor horrifies you. You understand and respond not with the glee of misery-company or piling-on-relief, rather you marvel at the depth of the destructive power of sin in light of the tremendous healing and transforming power of the gospel.

It is the human condition that is addressed in the gospel. The gospel are the words of life that transform us into the image and likeness of Christ. You are not left to your own devices and strategies and strengths to bring about change in your life – it won’t get you far enough. We have been given grace that forgives and changes. So surrender.

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